On a routine archaelogical dig I found this terrifying piece of non-fiction scratched into the skull of an ape of some sort.
“I was walking down a street, a street I'd walked down a million times before and passed a phonebox, a phonebox I'd passed a million times before. There was a man inside the phonebox and I'd never seen him before in my life, let alone a million times.
"Hey, c'mere a minute" he said. I had many minutes to spare so I went over there a minute.
"Kid, this phonebox what you see before you can go back in time. Not only that, but it can can forwards in time".
"Like in Bill and Ted?" I asked.
"No" he said "exactly like in Bill and Ted."
So he invited me back in time. Why not? I thought. It's not everyday you get invited back in time. We went right back, all the way back to dinosaur time. It wasn't like I expected, for starters the dinosaurs weren't as stupid as everyone says. I really clicked with a couple of them. It started getting dark, so I asked if it was time to get back to the future, but the guy said that wasn't part of the deal. At which point he ran into the phonebox and disappeared. To be fair, it wasn't part of the deal and it was my own fault for not checking that I had a lift back. That's what happens when you assume. It's not so bad. I guess I'll just live out the rest of my days here.”
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