"I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last man on Earth" she said. They were pretty hurtful words. I didn't let emotion get the better of me though and I set about killing every man on the planet. Once I'd done it I approached her again and asked her to sleep with me.
"No!" she said.
"Oh, go on." I said "Look at the effort I've gone to."
"But I said I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on Earth". I had completely misheard her when she said it the first time.
"Shit, I thought you said you would! I feel like a bloody idiot". We carried on chatting and eventually she did admit that I'd gone to a lot of trouble and she felt a bit sorry for me, so she gave me a blowjob in the back of my car.
Robert, New York.