Christmas was two weeks away and the football manager found his team at the bottom of the Premier League. The chairman was concerned; he called the manager into his office and expressed his fears.

"The season is halfway over and we're bottom of the league. The team that's bottom at Christmas is almost certain to get relegated. Relegation would see us lose over £40 million next year. Realistically, how much would you need to spend in the January transfer window to ensure our survival?"

"We don't need to spend anything." the manager replied.

"You think the squad is good enough to stay up?" the chairman asked.

"Oh, no chance, but it's not a problem. I never signed any of our players because I thought they could help us avoid relegation. I thought that much was obvious."

"How so?" the chairman asked.

"Well look at them; they're all handsome."


"And they're terrible at football, but look at their faces." the manager said, pulling a team photo from his wallet. "We've got the best looking team in the league. The new year is nearly upon us and you know what that means; calendars. What we lose in TV revenue next season we will more than recoup in calendar sales."

The chairman saw that this was true and smiled. They really were very handsome.

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